Sex and the college girl
The women’s colleges of the East (and I can only speak authoritatively about Smith) subtly emanated, over a four-year period, a concept of the ideal American woman, nothing short of fantastic. She must be both a wife, a mother, a community contributor and perhaps a career woman. In addition to this, she must be attractive, charming, gracious and in good spirits; talk intelligently about her husband’s work, but do not try to talk about it; keep her house looking like a House Beautiful page; and be effective, but not in a intimidating way. While dealing with all of this, she should be relaxed and happy, find time to read, paint and listen to music, have philosophical thoughts, be the keeper of the culture at home, and lift her husband’s gaze at home. above the TV. Because it is an integral part of the concept of liberal education of better human beings, to make them more reflective and understanding, to broaden their interests. Liberal education is a trust. It shouldn’t be thrown away lightly during graduation, but it should be used every day, forever.
These are all the things a liberally educated girl should do, and in her past there has been a curious lack of definition of the things she should not do. Parents who have lived in the Jazz Age can’t very well forbid adventure, or take a very firm stance on sex. Even if they do, their daughters rarely listen. What to do or not to do about sex these days is relative. Everything depends. This does not mean that there are no more moral standards; there certainly are – the fact that sex always causes guilt and worry proves it. But moral generalizations seem distant and unreal, which our grandparents believed.
Today, girls are expected to judge each situation for itself, a much more demanding task. A man recently told me that he found girls to be rather incompetent in this area because having a square view of a new relationship early on, before sex entered it, requires more maturity and insight. than most female students. He said he found these girls inconsistent in their attitude towards him – sexual sirens at first (when they wanted to attract him), promising everything, then becoming more and more distant and more and more anxious to chat from the relationship step by step, when logically, their behavior should be completely reversed; he had thought that as they got to know and love him, they would be more relaxed about sex.
The point is, lacking a solid background in Christian ethics, most girls have only a few vague rules of thumb to follow, which they cling to beyond all sense and reason. And these, interestingly enough, contradict each other. One is that all is well if you are in love (romantic, movies and some fiction – the American dream of love) and the other is that a girl should be respected, especially by the man who is in love. ‘she wants to marry (ethical, left of grandmother). As these are extremely fragile and require the girl to know whether or not there is a chance for love in the relationship, sex, for her, requires constant corroborating discussion as she tries to probe the depths of the relationship. intentions of a man. Actions alone are not trustworthy. After all, a prostitute can arouse a man as well (and probably better) than a “nice” girl. But if a man loves her for herself, and not just her body, he will increase his wandering hands with a few well-placed words of love. Clinging to her two conflicting principles, she tries to be a sex demon and Miss Priss at tea at the same time; she tries not to see what the strange companions of love and convenience are.